Giving Credit

Biig Al paid up yesterday. Since I had previously posted that, after cleaning his cat's litter box for a week, he owed me points, I feel that it is only fair to give credit for yesterday's game. Partner/husband has set up a regular Tuesday game with Barney so I asked Al to play. I'm always honored when Al says "yes". It can't be easy for a bridge master to play with someone as low level as me. It was a really fun game and we netted a little over a point. Barney and husband/partner netted about .6 so I gained a half a point on husband/partner who remains 4 points out in the Ace of Clubs race. It's probably too late in the year to make up that amount so, I'm continuing my yoga and tai chi to attain inner bridge harmony.

The Worst Round Ever

Last night, at the wonderful, well run by bridge dynamo Nell Morgan, well loved New Braunfels sectional, we were given an entry for north/south. Partner/husband wanted to switch to our usual east/west but I said no. I think the directors seat you where they need you and I hate to ask to switch without a compelling reason. East/west took 25 out of 27 bids and had 6 slams their way. We took two hands only; the first, a weaky freaky 4 hearts which brave partner/husband bid and made where I had about 3 points but 5 of his hearts. The last board of a verrry long night, I had 17 HCPs and opened one no trump - only the second opening hand I had in the round. Partner passed - I was down one.

One of our fellow beginners looked as shell shocked as we did. When we met at the one round to go scoring list, she said, "If it were like this all the time, I would never play again". I agree. Remember those old gray metal meat grinders with a vise grip thing to hold them on the edge of the heavy wooden kitchen table? Mom used to throw all kinds of leftover meat into it, turn the handle and grind out little shreds to make hash. After last night's session, we felt like the meat. Husband/partner used the wringer washer analogy. I think we need to work on new analogies. We are incomprehensible to our children who have no idea that the results of a meat grinder or wringer washer look like us after a round of rotten bridge.

The last time this happened to us was April 1st of 2008. We had 24 out of 26 negative scores as did most pairs who sat our way. We thought it was an April fools joke. It wasn't. Of course, like last night, our negative scores were lower than most others, defense being the biggest need for improvement in our game.

We tried not to whine but we did ask Director Scott how they came up with those hands. He told us that the ACBL provides them and that they are randomly generated. If he means computer randomly generated, someone needs to seriously look at that programming. I suppose, in truly random fashion, anything can happen at any time and the mathematicians among us could explain such happenings but it would be beyond my understanding anyway.

I prefer the conspiracy theory. We almost always sit east/west. The evil bridge fates knew what was coming and, purposely, sat us north/south. I wonder if they are trying to tell us something?

Correction

Previously, I wrote that I had opened a Flannery bid with 9 points. Director Tom read my blog (since I told him that he was in it) and, when I walked into the Civic Center in New Braunfels yesterday, he told me, with a grin, that I was a dirty, rotten liar. Looking shocked (I wasn't), he told me that I had held 8 points not nine. He didn't buy my argument that I had upgraded my singleton queen of diamonds to 3. Nope, he didn't budge. He said that if I did it again he would throw me out. Shoot, I'm a child of the 60s. I've been thrown out of way better places than a bridge tournie.

We first met Director Tom last year at a sectional early in our duplicate days. Husband/partner had revoked three different times and Tom was quite tired of appearing at our table and ruling against us. At the first board of the session last night, husband/partner revoked. I had even asked, "no spades partner?", remembering Tom's original lecture that a revoke is partly partner's fault if partner does not ask the confirmation question.

Tom didn't even look surprised - one trick penalty. I later misplayed a makeable 3 NT hand to make up for husband/partner's error and give us one zero board each. Luckily, there is no director call for bad play.

Back to New Braunfels in a little while to mine for silver yet again.

It's Always Something

I thought I made a particularly brilliant bid today. With 5 hearts to the 10 and 4 good spades and a total of about 9 points (pushing it to count a singleton queen), I opened a Flannery 2 diamonds. Left hand opponent asked husband/partner about my bid. Husband/partner gave the 5 heart/four spade/11-15 point correct explanation. LHO doubled and good partner/husband bid 2 spades. Right hand opponent bid 3 clubs and I bid 3 spades as a suicide bid knowing there was no way I would make it but figuring that they had something more than 100. I went down two.  We opened the traveler and the opponents were making 3 NT on all previous boards. Left hand opponent felt cheated in that I had nine measleys and she had counted on at least 11 and quit bidding. I felt bad but thought I had made a brilliant defensive bid. Not so fast Ms. Novice.

At our encouragement, LHO called our fave tournament director, Tom, who was directing the game. I got a lecture (one of many helpful ones from Tom) on how "psyching" is not legal in a 2 suited opening convention. In other words, I had to have at least 11 HCPs to use it and anything else incurred a penalty. Oh no!!! Just when I think I'm being brilliant, I mess up our game. How typical.  The problem is, if someone told me I had to make a psych bid, I wouldn't have the slightest idea how to do it. I didn't know it was wrong in this case nor did I know I had "psyched" but ignorance of the law..... you know the rest. Tom made what I thought was a fair ruling for both parties but warned me that he would remember and if I did it again, the penalty would be far more severe. 

Now, if I can just remember the point count for opening Flannery is 11 and not 9, I'll be fine.

It's Fall

At last, it has rained, the days are finally below 100 degrees, partner/husband's beloved Phillies are making their way into the playoffs and we went to an Austin sectional yesterday placing in two sessions. I am a great believer in omens. However, partner/husband has zoomed 4.5 points ahead of me in the Ace of Clubs race. I'm meditating and doing yoga to deal with this. So far, the zen state is eluding me but I have only whined about it occasionally. Housework today and back to Austin tomorrow with the hope that our streak keeps rolling.

We have both received great advice from the masters who occasionally play as our partners. Husband/partner has been told to take both hands into consideration when bidding and not just his own. I have been advised to stop dumping on partner/husband when he makes a mistake. We have agreed to go back to friend Steve's suggestion. When one partner takes exception to a lead/bid/play etc., he/she requests the other partner to "circle it" on the score sheet for later discussion. This is code for "stop discussing now; I'm getting upset; I don't want to hear about it; I know I messed up; NOT NOW PLEASE" or all of the above. Sometimes the offending partner has to say "circle it; circle it; CIRCLE IT!!!" before the ranting partner finally stops talking. Granted, this doesn't happen often but we are working on better partnership manners. Teacher Everette always reminds his classes that dumping on partner results in losing partner for at least three tables. I can testify to the truth of this from my time as dumpee. I'm not ALWAYS the dumper.

The good news is that, for me, my joy in playing the game no matter the result seems to have returned. It came back, of all things, when playing with Biig Al last week. We didn't have a good game but had a big load of fun playing together. Biig Al and dementor Robert had been on a road trip stealing gold from the Bostonians at a regional in New England. Meanwhile husband/partner fed Al's cat and I cleaned the litter box. The cat is not crazy about women so I stayed out of the way while husband/partner played with her. Mostly, she would look at me and run under the bed. Anyway, I told Biig Al he owed me a game. I forgot to mention that he owed me a game where we actually made points. As far as I am concerned, he hasn't paid up yet.

Okay - off to dusting and vacuuming - way less fun than playing bridge.

Depression

My friends at the bridge club have been asking why I haven't written anything in a while. One word answer - depression. I don't want to write a downer blog; I'd rather write funny stuff but not too much funny has been happening lately or maybe it has and I haven't noticed. I misplayed a makeable 6 NT hand last night and was feeling pretty down and crabby when really good player, Daniel, told me that my problem was a bad attitude. I gave him a nasty smart remark back, probably because he hit too close to home. Okay - maybe he has a point. Okay - he is definitely right. I need an attitude adjustment or, as another player suggested, Zoloft (antidepressant for you non medical types).

I'm not doing the medicate myself into oblivion thing so I need an alternative. I know; I can blame husband/partner! Um, maybe not. When I try to do that ( I know I shouldn't but do anyway), the really good players tell me he didn't do anything wrong; I did. I guess that's why he is beating me in the Ace of Clubs race. I figure that is the bridge God's revenge for my sin in blaming partner/husband.

You know what I really, really hate? TRAVELERS!! Partner/husband says I shouldn't look at them. It's hard not to when everyone discusses what others did before us. It's more difficult still when the previous tables made their 6 NTs and I didn't. I suppose I could take a bathroom break at the end of each board but then people would be telling me to get a bladder control medicine rather than Zoloft.

Partner/husband and I are playing with several people other than each other this week. That might be a good thing, unless he zooms farther ahead in the Ace of Clubs race. I've been really nice to him lately. Maybe the bridge Goddess will notice.