Day Care

Have you noticed the similarities between your bridge club and a day care center?  Let me name a few:




1.  Snacks must be provided.  No one can get through a whole round of bridge without chips, dip, donuts,  popcorn, leftover Halloween candy, leftover birthday cake and whatever other leftovers have been lying around the house which people say, "Oh, I'll just bring it to the bridge club and it will get eaten".  True statement that.


2.  As director, part of the job is calling for quiet between rounds.  "Use your indoor voices" or "shhh"  or "Quiet down people".    With a large number of players with hearing aides which barely function, it isn't easy to keep scores or the play of the hand from being overheard by the next table.


3.  Some players decide it's nap time.  Directors find themselves using cattle prods to wake people up to bid, complete the round,  or to move to the next table. 


4.  Everyone is supposed to play nice with everyone else.


5.  Bridge has the equivalent of time outs for zero tolerance violations.  Violators are fined match points or sent home without snacks.


6.  Players must be reminded to clean up after themselves.  Apparently, some of them never learned this in kindergarten.


7.  Entertainment is a must.  Hula hoop contests at the Luau, lottery wins, free games WITH FOOD, put on by the unit.   To a bridge player, a free game with food provided is the best of all possible worlds.


8.  Like holding hands in line, you must have a partner.




Maybe it is true that as we age, we regress.  Playing bridge, for me, brings back memories of elementary school.