The title is a line from the MUSIC MAN spoken by the mayor's wife to any kid who said, "darn" or "gee whiz" or whatever passed for kid curses back then. I want to yell it at sportscasters and athletes who, on a regular basis, massacre my generation's English language. I know that language evolves. Otherwise the conversation at the bridge table might go something like this:
"Partner, thou dost not have any hearts?" or "I goeth forth with the knave of spades". No, I'm not that olde that I want to go back to Shakespearean English.
However, when did the word disrespect become a verb? My son tells me it is listed as such in the dictionary. I object, but, sadly, no one asked me. Worse yet is the prefix "dis" which also seems to have become a verb somewhere along the line when I was off the track and not looking.
My all time favorite word destruction is by our own Sean Elliott, now Spurs sportscaster. If the Spurs are rolling, he says they are on a "Joggernaut". Is that an astronaut out for a jog in space? I think he means "juggernaut" as in rolling over the opposition. I don't have many jogger or juggernauts in my bridge game but I continue to hope for the future.
Sean also says, "The Spurs need to 'score the ball'." What the heck else would they score? Does he mean take a knife and carve it up? If we need to "score the cards" should we think about shredding the deck? I think about that a lot after going down in no trump while the field makes three.
I'm delighted that most bridge players are my age and their English usage is akin to mine. In what other sport can you hear the word "penultimate" as often as in bridge tournaments? It's a great word. You never hear a sportscaster say "We are in the penultimate quarter". Nope. Maybe I should watch less sports. It would help my blood pressure if I just watched with the mute button on. Maybe I should play more bridge instead. I don't see how that would help the blood pressure issue though.
Until next time folks, watch that phraseology!
